Daily Archives: September 3, 2016

30. Gratitude – According To His Will

Hanging

 

I am grateful today for Divine timing and grace, perspective, and the fact that I’m learning to no longer have the need to be in control!

We Can’t Always Immediately See How the Puzzle Pieces Fit Together

No matter how positive I believe I am, if I’m honest with myself, there are often times of difficulty and doubt somewhere along the journey! Control is a funny thing! It’s easy to stay calm and relaxed when nothing’s on the line! Yet when what I’ve had my heart settled on for many years (Hmmm… see anything wrong here?) seems to be slipping from my grasp, it’s not quite so easy to sit back and be the back seat driver, or better yet, just the passenger. Perspective and timing are critical factors in how things unfold in our lives, and I’ve been reminded a great deal of late that my perspective and timing are not really the best. I have some perspective vision problems that are impossible to fully correct while in this mortal body! What I mean by that is I’m obviously quite finite in every aspect of the word! My physical life here on this earth, my perceptions, and my ability to see the big picture in terms of how all the puzzle pieces fit together are dependent on my viewpoint, which quite frankly is limited! Like mostly everyone else here, (because you know there are always exceptions!) I have the privilege of only seeing where I have been and where I am right now. I can glean incredible amounts of wisdom from just the experiences alone that I have been through to date, yet there’s nothing that gives me a clear indication of what’s to come in its entirety! We may have glimpses, but even so, nothing is set in stone until it has transpired, and as I’m sure we have all experienced, life is ridiculously fluid and changes from moment to moment. The characteristic of infinite perspective belongs to the Divine only, and knowing that makes it a bit easier to relinquish my grip upon the wheel, and turn over the steering to One who can see far more clearly, perfectly to be more precise, in the distance.

Detours And Setbacks Have A Role To Play

Experience has taught me that not only does my finite vision lead to me driving into the ditch far too often, it also creates unnecessary injuries along the way, as most “accidents” do. Take heart though, as even these detours and setbacks have a role to play in carrying out infinite purpose! The decisions I have made in this lifetime up until now have been discerned on limited information, as I have no certainty of whether or not I will even be here tomorrow, let alone what those days ahead might hold! Hindsight has become an invaluable tool, as it has provided me with a testing ground, if you will. In hindsight, I can say with certainty and clarity that EVERYTHING that has transpired so far in my life (Yes, the good, the bad, and even the really ugly!) has carried purpose, yet not always purpose I was able to discern at that particular time. So often, it’s not until many years later that we can look back and see how all the pieces were fit together to form a whole, when at the time, there were some pieces we were not even aware existed yet!

It’s Not Always About Me

These experiences have taught me that I have a strong track record, a brilliant history of survival, as I’m still here! I can see how most situations have played into the strengthening of my skill sets (physically, emotionally, & spiritually), which in turn have typically prepared me for something I have yet to experience that will require those skills. Another thing I have learned is it’s not always about me! Yeah, I know, I really did say that! It’s so easy to look at circumstances and just not fully understand how they could have possibly benefitted us, as even in hindsight, there may not always be a clear answer for the inner questions we have about why things transpire. I believe that’s because we are often vessels in the lives of others. There are times that simply daydreaming and sitting too long after a traffic light has turned green, creates a change. That change delayed traffic, which then kept the vehicles back just far enough that the cars were not swept up by a freak tornado that just happened to spontaneously appear. Had they been 2 minutes earlier it would have taken their lives. This is actually a true story! Things like this happen ALL THE TIME, but because we don’t always have a front seat in the theater of the lives of others, we never really know that we’re a part of that scenario! This is happening much more often than you might think!

Things Are Exactly As They Should Be

All of this to say… our finite perspectives make it impossible to see any given picture in its entirety. We will only be able to see a skewed and limited perspective at any given time, and with trust and faith, not to mention a fabulous track record, we can breathe a little easier and know that whether we see it or not, all is as it should be. Things always have a way of working out in the end. The question in the meantime becomes, “What is it we are supposed to learn and take away from these experiences?” If we’re not asking the questions, we’re missing incredible opportunities for growth and depth.

In my case, it’s been trust and surrender, and let me tell you, they have died hard and periodically resurrect for another slaying! Be encouraged and know that all things do work together for good, even when it may not be visible at the time!

Love and Light,
Laura Lum Corby 🙂

This is a poem I wrote a while back that speaks directly to this discussion.

According To His Will

Many times we lack
The understanding that we need
While watching the events of life unfold
We question those around us
In hopes that we will find
The answers that only God can hold
We hope and pray in times of doubt
For wisdom in our choices
Wishing His entire plan was known
But finite in our vision
We often will not see
That through our trial another seed was sown
But when we meet Him face to face
Eternal in perspective
I don’t believe we’ll need to question still
We’ll see that all the tribulations
We had to endure
Worked for good according to His will

© 1995 Laura Lum Corby

29. Ditch The Need To Be Right!

Need to be rightI giggle to myself now as I read this. There was a time, not all that long ago, that I’d argue throughout eternity, until you conceded, if I was convinced I was right. You can ask my mom! I never lost an argument. I was not someone you wanted to take on and apparently I missed my calling as a defense attorney! I never argued unless I was pretty sure I was correct. Sadly, that was far too often. I was a keeper of facts, and I could lay out every detail to support my case and wind my way around conversations that would make your head spin. Why was it so important for me to be right? Why couldn’t I walk away, believing I was correct, without having to convince the other person as well? Many relationships were damaged or destroyed because of my rigidity and unwillingness to let things go that really didn’t matter!

I saw a post a while back that suggested you ask the following question… “Will this matter 5 years from now? If not, let it go!” I had to let that sink in for a bit, and needless to say, it didn’t sit very well with me for a long time. I was the female Dragnet. I was just about the facts ma’am! I could slice them, dice them, and present them any way you wanted, and was more than willing to do so… if it meant I could prove I was right. To what end, I ask? I learned the hard way the destructiveness that comes from this mindset and behavior. Firstly, there’s something fundamentally askew with anyone who believes they’re always right! Secondly, there are usually some very deep-seated, highly unhealthy false beliefs in place with anyone who consistently takes this approach.

These days, being right isn’t really something that’s important to me. I’ve taken a hard look in the mirror. I’ve done a great deal of soul-searching and sorting out these needs and the beliefs that lay at their foundations. Though I’ll always have more sorting and healing to do, arguing isn’t really something I choose to engage in any longer. Oh, I catch myself once in a while, but the occasions are few and much farther between, thankfully. When they do happen, I’m pretty quick to catch it and nip it in the bud. I still have a passion to educate and I still love seeking truth, but arguing about it is no longer in my repertoire. I want to help others and make a difference in this world, only now I recognize my only job is simply doing what I love to do. I teach, I’m a conduit for healing, I encourage, I love, I inspire, and I hope I help duplicate these passions and characteristics in others who want to do the same.

The biggest difference now is I no longer wrestle with the perceptions others have about me. I totally dig who I have become, and therefore, I no longer have a need to prove my worthiness to anyone else. I don’t need to be right any longer! I matter, I’m worthy, and I love who I am. Someone else’s opinion of me doesn’t ever change those facts! With that in mind, what someone else chooses to do with the information I put out there is none of my business! It’s no reflection on me. Whether or not someone agrees with me isn’t my issue, it’s theirs. The onus is on them to research it, if they’re really interested in sorting out fact from fiction! It’s no longer my responsibility to police and correct the world! OK, it never really was, but I digress! I no longer care if others try to egg me on, or attempt to bait me into an argument. I’ve learned not to attend every party I’ve been invited to. I prefer to spend my time conversing with those who have a desire to hear what I have to say. Not because it feeds my ego, but because I know the things that have forever changed my life in awe-inspiring ways, and I want to share them with every other living, breathing person who is interested in learning about the same! I’m also keenly interested in listening these days, not just speaking. There is such a tremendous freedom that comes from no longer needing to be right or to prove yourself. I am forever grateful that lesson didn’t pass me by.

The next time you catch yourself in a defensive posture, arguing with someone, digging those heels in and determined to prove you’re right, remember to ask the question and heed the advice…

Will this matter in 5 years? If not, let it go!

Love & Light,
Laura Lum Corby